Monday, 02 February 2009

• Currently Game of Love By Santana see related

  Steps in Coping

  I admit that I am trying to still cope.  Sometimes, I can feel that I am almost on my way to accepting but when some memories are coming back, I think this makes it harder.

  Therefore, I am posting this:

  Stages of Coping

  -Denial.  Why did the relationship end?  If we will keep on asking myself for things that could have gone right and what wrong could have been avoided, then it means we are always denying myself to move on.

  -Anger.  There is a bit of anger in some sense as to why we have even invited ourself to be in the situation of having a relationship knowing that it there can be an emotional turmoil.  Or why does it have to happen?  Why is it so hard to accept the way things are or at least work it out?

  -Bargaining.  We tend to think of a way to get back onto the same guy by thinking what we can do to mend the misunderstanding after the breakup

  -Depression. We are thinking of all the possibilities that have been done to avoid the situation leading to some sort of us being lonely.  Therefore, we should avoid not thinking of the situation but thinking of other activities so as the situation not to control us.

  -Acceptance.  This is the last stage.  We can accept that things are for the better and there is no reason for keeping the heartaches.  This can also mean that letting go is loving too to make it better for us.  At this stage, we are ready to move on for the next stage of our life.  Perhaps another relationship.  Hopefully, the past has given us enough education and learning to be a better person and to filter our choices and make the right decision.

  According to my best friend, the first 4 entries are not really in particular order.  These will keep on haunting us until we finally resolve to the idea of accepting what had become of us in the relationship.

  The most effective way of coping is to meet people and get to know more and more friends.  While in reality, we need to understand why we really have to end the relationship for the good of 2 people who had shared some good memories together.  If in the end, there is still a possibility, God will make a way.  If not, then God has other reason for things not to happen the way we wanted to.

   

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